18.1.10

The Weekend and the Dream

This weekend, my mom celebrated her 50th birthday. We have the most ridiculous relationship. We get along one minute and the next we are heavily arguing over something ridiculous. Nonetheless, I love her more than words can say and am so blessed to be her daughter. I can only pray and hope that I will be at least half of the mother, nurse, and friend that she is.

So a few months ago, my heart broke as Childrens Los Angeles (CHLA) told me that their Hem/Onc floor would not be hiring any residents for the March cohort. I applied for Cardiac Transplant anyway because CHLA is such an incredible facility. I didn't get the job. I wasn't too sad, because that isn't what I am most passionate about, but I was definitely taken aback. Then I found out that Loma Linda Children's Hospital hem/onc floor wasn't hiring either. I seriously started doubting what had been my dream for so long. I doubted that I should be a peds oncology nurse and that maybe that's not what God wants me to do. I let myself start to believe that.Then I remembered that there is a reason why this is my passion. I mean, it's not everyday that someone has a passion for cancer...or rather a passion for helping people with cancer. I want to kill this disease, but I don't have the power to do that. So I hope that in my journey as a peds oncology nurse I can help dull the pain, provide hope, and just be a hand to hold when all the medication and treatment isn't enough.

Anyways... Last Monday, I got a call from the nurse recruiter at CHLA telling me that 4e (HEM/ONC!) wanted to take ONE resident and they wanted me to interview for it. I went on Thursday and absolutely fell in love with the floor. 4 east is all the leukemia's and lymphomas, as well as some hematology patients. 4 west is all the solid tumors. And right behind them is the bone marrow transplant unit. The managers were incredibly nice and informative. I got the call today that I got the job!!! I will be a pediatric oncology nurse. I have had this dream for so long. At least since highschool. I am so excited. and terrified. and I just feel so blessed to have the opportunity to work with some of the strongest kids on the planet.

Current Favorites: From Where You Are - Lifehouse
Away- Wakey Wakey
Brookelyn- Wakey Wakey

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